How do I get back at a black?

Dear Mr. Nerd,
While trying to gain as much immense knowledge as you, an annoying black kid began to get in my grill. Well let me start at the beginning, it all started with me displaying my knowledge for the betterment of my classmates when He-Who-Should-Not-Be-Name's ego started trumping around and ruining everyone's day. When I asked him respectfully to allow me to finish, he began berating me with insults regarding my academic qualifications regarding his inclusion into a so called "elite" organization at my school. How could I get back at him without seeming racist or outwardly against the Presidents "race" (he is a halvsie).

Sincerely, Joe Biden

Dear "Joe",
I too have been insulted by black people. It is quite annoying. The truth is, blacks are often placed in elite groups merely because these groups need to look like they're not being racist. The certain individual you are speaking of may not have been put into an elite group for this reason, but it may have contributed to overall factors. And just because some random person, regardless of racial origin, insults you, you should not take this to heart. After all, I'm sure your academic qualifications and grades speak for themselves. But to get to your question: how to get back at him without being racist. There are many ways to do this:
1) beat him up
2) get invited to a social occassion with him and show up with your really hot girlfriend while he comes alone
3) insult his political views without neccessarily targeting Mr. Obama's blackness
4) do something totally inappropriate and/or outrageous and blame it on him. Make sure to have "evidence", though he might be racially predisposed to accusation. According to a New York Press study, in Maryland from the winters of 1995-1997, 70% of those drivers stopped by police on Interstate 95 were black, but according to an ACLU survey conducted at the same time, blacks made up only 17.5% of drivers who commited criminal acts (such as speeding, traffic violations) on Interstate 95. (Source: http://www.neonjoint.com/your_rights/facts/racial-profiling-stats.html)
5) do things just to piss him off, but make sure that these things can easily be blamed on coincidence or other people, i.e.: stealing his pencil, stealing his books, etc.
6) visit this blog more often. This will get back at him. Though you and I know why this is, I cannot divulge any more information online for the sake of privacy.

Hope this helps!
- The Nerd